Daily Simpson Knowledge

"If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers." - homer j.

Why do I suck

At what point do we ask ourselves when to accept we are not ever going to be good at something.... For example my friend/nemesis is obsessed with a game called Halo. Now Halo is a great game but the simple truth is some people are naturals, some people work hard and get good and still others practice day and night and still suck. So back to my friend fawn (name changed for privacy) who I just witnessed getting his ass wooped by a bunch of 11 year olds. It was truly a sad sight watching a grown man cry as small children giggled over his corpse. Not much he can say back to this kids except for maybe "well atleast I get laid" (which I witnessed my other friend tricket (name protected) use repeatedly) so once again I ask when should we accept that we are limited by our abilities and the quicker we accept that the faster we save ourselves from the embarrassment and stink of failure. So my advice is simple, pack the ego away and realize your destiny is to build the fragile egos of 11 year old boys as they mock you... or you can just quit, move on and try something else. (advice I still have not taken myself ofcourse.)
"hey fawn the jerk store called and they are all out of you..."

for the principal...enjoy you perve 

Daily Simpson Knowledge

"Help! She's touching my special area!" - ralph wiggum (episode-This Little Wiggy)

"You know Moe, my mom once said something that really stuck with me. She said 'Homer, you're a big disappointment.' And God bless her soul, she was really onto something."
- homer j. (epsiode -There's No Disgrace Like Home)

Just not normal

You start off as a young child your days filled with snack times and recess. Next you worry about making friends and fitting in... highschool comes you start partying messing around with the ladies and in between you try and get into a good college. college is a lot of drinking doing drugs and an occasional nap in class. You graduate get a job and make some money, learn responsibility and how tough the real world is. Once you master that you get a significant other and have lots of sex and fights with an occasional discussion on politics. After some time of make up sex and and discovering each others little annoying quirks you realize you can spend the rest of your life doing it over and over. So you get married blah blah blah and live happily ever after. The point is out of all my friends from college and work etc... Not to many marriages. Why is that? Why is it the people that surround me don't seem to believe in the sanctity of marriage. And I don't want to hear there are no good guys left or every time I meet a girl her ass seems to get larger by the minute. Bunch of bullshit, cuz lets be honest we are not getting any better looking so just settle already...
it would appear that we are quite the strange compilation of individuals. I do have a multiple of friends who have been with their significant others for a year or two or seven for that matter but none seem to be able to just say it "will you marry me?" what the hell kind of crap is that will you guys just get in the game and lead by example.
this post is specifically directed to the gentlemen that I have the significant wager with (you know who are, doger and jimmy (names changed for privacy)).

Daily Simpson Knowledge

"Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel." - homer j.

some strange people out there... 

Words of wisdom..

I just don't get people... when did we become a world of "compromised values and diminished braincells." it amazes me when I go out an di see the way people act and what they say. Really a far cry from a time when people believed in something other than getting laid ( ofcourse I may be bitter on that point) So when I was in highschool I had a great teacher who told us a story about a man. The man approached this great looking woman and politely asked her " if I give you a million dollars would go home and have sex with me tonite..?" the women quickly said " absolutely I would sleep with you". So the man then looked at her and said "well terrific, would you have sex with me for $5..?" and to that the woman quickly yell back in disgust "no I would not what kind of women do you think I am... " the man smirked and said " we already established that, now I am just bargaining...."
well, well see you can learn valuable lessons as well as angry banter on my blog.

Daily Simpson Knowledge

"I wonder where Bart is, his dinner's getting all cold ...... and eaten." - homer j.
"My cat's breth smells like cat food." - ralph wiggum

Yummmmy

I must apologize because in this blog I have decided not to bitch and be angry but rather to endorse a great place. Sunday for Mr. lee's birthday we went out to a restaurant in midtown manhattan. By the name Churrascaria plataforma. It is a brazilian steakhouse and for those unaware of the greatest thing to come out of south America (that I can actually get my hands on)this is it. It is all you can eat, multiple meats such as sirloins, flank, chicken, pork, turkey etc.... So why am I telling you this, because you must try it yourselves. After getting my hands on some great juicy tender beef I was as giggly as a schoolgirl, I couldn't help just smile. Every time I waited for the next piece of meat it was like foreplay, the anticipation of the next bite was torturous but so good. The amount of food I ate normally would feed me for a week but I couldn't stop. Every bite was like having a party in mouth and I didn't want it to end. Literally my stomach got so full it was like a balloon that was overfilled with hot air and becamed oddly shaped.
Do the right thing and go try it yourself cuz it was yummy in my tummy.

truly orgasmic