Daily Simpson Knowledge

"I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are." - homer j.

Junk in the trunk....

Years ago I said something so simple and and so on point that I am constantly reminded of that truth. I merely turned to a friend and said" I guess as I get older I will just have to accept girls with big asses." I was reminded of this recently when I saw a movie which one character said to the nice young bitchy thing "you can't rely on that nice 22 yr old ass of yours to take care of you your entire life. I just hope you get a personality when you turn 30." (That ofcourse is more of a paraphrase than a direct quote) my point is I have friends who for some time have embraced the padunk-a-dunk, you know the junk in the trunk ghetto bootie. But to me the whole j-lo beyonce trend is not one to be embraced but rather observed with caution. We must proceed with caution in the direction we steer our women. It reminds me of what that cursed thong song did, encouraging all women to wear the thong. And I have always encouraged the thong as normal wear but when walking on the beach or even in the mall now a days and you see these voluptuous, buxom, big boned women proudly flaunting their thongs I say boooh. Shame on you Cisco for that. Be careful gentlemen in encouraging the large-ass trend, it may come back to bite you in the ...you know what.
I do admit that i do like some curves on my women and a nice round shapely butt is a beatiful thing but we must draw the line somewhere.

Daily Simpson Knowledge

"Bart, a woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one!" - homer j.

Colin likes to pee...

For those of you who know Mr. Colin Burke you already know he loves to pee, whether he is peeing on an old tired dog, or peeing in a fountain and he even enjoys peeing on people if they get close enough.
So this night was an attempt to get wasted old school... beer pong and shitty kegs. And we succeeded to get inebriated quite well because it just seemed natural while colin was peeing someone should light him on fire. And even worse it didn't seem that disgusting that colin attempted to put it out with his pee and missed. Although he did hit one target... poor jimmy (name changed) got caught standing to close to a peeing colin....
to see it in action scroll down and enjoy the pics... You freaks.
for being gracious and allowing you sicko's to see this, colin has requested your help in naming his new dog... Please vote in the poll.

Daily Simpson Knowledge

"You never know when an old calendar might come in handy! Sure, it's not 1985 right now, but who knows what tomorrow will bring? " - homer j.

"Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip." - homer j.

The all knowing

I really love talking to people... people are just amazing creatures. The more and more I speak with people the more I am amazed at how smart every body is. Maybe I have just been fortunate in life to be surrounded by exceptionally intelligent people or maybe (but I doubt it ) people are so full of shit they actually believe the nonsense that comes out of their mouths. I can talk to people about politics, poker or even day trading (that's what I do, in the loosest terms) and no matter the subject people have all the answers. Its one thing to have an opinion its another thing to think your opinion is fact. A great example; Let's call him daul (name changed) argued with Doger (n.c.f.p. (name changed for privacy I will be writing that for now on.)) and myself about how his company was the greatest(Lerril Mynch n.c.f.p.) he explained to us how they were the best and what he does is a real job and what we do was shit and ruining the market. And he seemed so sure that I personally was ready to believe everything but when he further explained himself with facts, figures, and an extreme knowledge base of my job I was impressed. He was right, I quickly felt an intense pain in my stomach at first because I thought maybe I was doing something terrible with my life but then I realized it was the stench of the shit coming out of his mouth. Come on people lets wake up and face the facts most of don't know shit about most things. I myself on the occasion may act like I know a lot but that is more for effect and because I have never been wrong. So all I ask is for you to look around and make sure no one is around and repeat after me
" I am dumb, I am so full of crap it disgusts me, the one thing I do know for sure is that I know nothing." after that put the smile back on your face and go pick on some one who knows less then you. It will make you feel better, I know it always does for me.
enjoy the snow and remember you have an suv so that gives you the right to drive like an asshole in the snow...